MERRY CELEBRATION 'N ALL

Today is the 25th of December so Merry Christmas!

Christmas used to be my favourite time of year until four years ago  ( is it really four years?) when death  claimed my dad on 27th December just two days after Christmas. Life has never been the same in many ways but that is a story for another day. Can I say that my heart goes out to those of you who have lost your loved ones. There is no one like a dad, life is not the same without them but we can learn to live and dream again!

Today, I celebrate the fact that my dissertation was accepted, the university council accepted my results, I made it to the graduation list and come January 2015, I shall have one extra academic award to my name. Am I excited or am I excited. It is a dream come true and like I explained in several of my earlier posts, its been a tough road. Thank God am now here. Yes, we can dream and convert our dreams to reality. God puts these dreams on the inside of us and just like the bible says "He who started the good work in us is able to bring it to completion". He does not guarantee a bumpy free road though- my version.

So folks, merry merry christmas and let us continue to dream BIG!

A journey begins but with one step

One thousand three hundred seventy days ago, I started on this journey. At first it was all excitement that I had finally signed up to study again. Then the accounting terms began to confuse me, before long the university was revising its terms upwards so I had to save more to earn a decent education. When I had saved some more, the economy swerved so I got less pound sterlings from my hard earned  savings. Through all this, I chose to live one day at a time and keep focussed on my goal, to finish the course with the least stress.

Then the first academic year came to an end, it was all normal because only afew students completed their MA with the 9 months, so the bulk of us carried on. At the end of the second academic year, a lot of the students completed and a whole bunch of new ones joined the class. Then I started feeling like this mature student in the class as this was going to be my third year on  the course while other students were joining for the first time and naturally more zeal . What made it worse was having to explain to afew classmates that I picked up small talk with how I had chosen the longer route. Their reaction, "oh isn't that so boring, I just cant wait to get done with this course". I took it in good stride and I told myself, well, thats them and I know better than having a stressful job and demanding school work all at the same time. 

I always celebrated my milestones; when I handed in my assignment, when I passed my assignment, when I got feedback from my tutor, when I sat for my exams and when I passed my exams. Each time I would remind myself that I have X papers to go and would soon be through. It worked and kept me sober all through.

On 31st March, I sat for my very last paper. I felt like a boulder had been taken off my shoulders. Better still, six weeks later when I received my results and I had passed, I felt like a million dollars. So for the next 90 days, I shall be busy putting my dissertation together for September. Am I excited? Absolutely. I know it has been a worthwhile four years investment and am sure it is gonna pay off. Until then, I shall carry on with my journery, one day at a time :)

Anxiety

Anxiety, that really short word causes a lot of trouble. I have had a lot going on with me and I must confess that for the past three weeks, my middle name has been Anxious!

I cringed at any slight provocation ( ok, I am ordinarily calm and collected), I feared for my past, my future and my present. No, I am not part of boko Haram and did not steal or get involved in any financial or any other scandal. i just made a series of bad choices and boy did this haunt me!

When I closed my eyes to pray, all I'd think about is just how much trouble I am in. So i would give it a few dedicated minutes of thought, say amen and get off my knees. (i generally could not pray). While I was still at that, my heart kept racing unnecessarily occasionally and there was just nothing I could do to calm me down.

Fear is a horrible thing! After suffering for three weeks, I remembered that the word of God has answers for absolutely everything. I decided, I aint going to suffer any more. I am going to stand on scripture and overcome my situation. Guess what the first verse I came across read

"Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved. (Psalm 55:22 ESV)"

Ama do just that. I feel relieved already. Why did I even keep myself in prison for three whole weeks? Whatever comes, am going to cast it on the Lord. he knows what to do about it. I needn't worry myself anymore. Whats bothering you? You don't need to carry it, cast it unto the Lord and share in the beautiful feeling.

Happy New Year!